There are childhood memories that stay with us — not because we choose them, but because they choose us.

They settle deep in our bones, quietly shaping who we become.

For RJ (Ramond James), one memory stands out like a photograph etched in time.
He’s three, maybe four years old, lying on the grass beneath a wide Christchurch sky.

Beside him is Sandra, his Barnardos home based educator. They’re watching clouds drift by — naming shapes, dreaming stories, soaking in the stillness.

For RJ, it wasn’t just a moment, it was a feeling – freedom, safety and a love for nature that would never leave him.

“I grew up with family violence. My dad wasn’t the nicest man,” RJ shares.

“But being with Sandra… that was my safe place. Even after I left her care, I’d go back if things happened. That’s where I would go.”

Those early years with Barnardos didn’t just offer care — they built a foundation, a sense of safety that RJ would carry into adulthood. And a quiet strength that would one day help him offer the same to others.

Quality early learning is about more than developmental milestones — it’s about nurturing a sense of belonging, wellbeing, and possibility in every tamaiti, and in their whānau within their community.

Barnardos educators lead this work with warmth, wisdom, and dedication — tailoring learning experiences to each child’s unique strengths, needs, and interests.

For RJ, Sandra’s care wasn’t just about learning — it was about feeling safe, seen, and supported. Her mahi helped lay the foundation for the man he would become.

Years passed. RJ grew up in Christchurch, finishing school and starting university, starting a double degree in geology and geography – drawn to the natural world and the sky he once lay under as a child. But life, like weather, can shift suddenly – the pandemic hit, his studies paused and work was hard to find.

That’s when RJ found his way back to Barnardos Aotearoa — this time, not as a child in early learning services, but as a young man ready to give back.

He began as a residential youth worker, doing night shifts at Te Poutama Ārahi Rangatahi – Barnardos’ therapeutic residential treatment programme for young boys aged 12-18 years old with at-risk behaviour. These rangatahi, referred by Oranga Tamariki, need extra support to feel safe, address trauma, rebuild trust, and find hope for their future.

RJ started first to support the team, check on young people – listening, making sure they felt safe. Just like Sandra had done for him.

Now, RJ works full-time on day shifts with youth at Te Poutama. He takes them out into the community, plays music with them, connects with nature, watches rugby. He helps them reconnect with the world — and with themselves.

“I started just wanting a job,” RJ says. “But when I saw one of our young people complete their journey, go from start to finish, and leave with hope — I realised this is what I’m meant to do.”

One of his proudest moments is helping the youth build their first hāngī pit.

“We had it built, then the rangatahi prepped the food the night before – they were responsible for the whole process, cooking for 70 people. It was theirs. That sense of pride — you could feel it.”

“I am Māori, and it’s important for me to always bring a te ao Māori lens to what I do — even with rangatahi who aren’t Māori, because everyone can benefit from it.”

Providing a sense of safety, for rangatahi who have experienced far too much for their age including insecurity and lack of belonging, is crucial for RJ. And it stems back from what he found with his Barnardos educator many years ago.

“Making the youth feel safe – once they do and you can build that, that's when transformation happens. So I try to do that with young people through daily interaction, being consistent, and always show up – not matter what.”

For RJ, youth work isn’t just a job – it’s a calling. He’s now a key worker, guiding young people through their healing journeys, helping them build the same foundation of safety and trust that changed his life.

“Childhood shapes a lifetime,” he says. “But it’s never too late to change the story.”

“With youth I see, who have had pretty traumatic upbringing, if they’d been dealt a different deck of cards, they would have had different outcomes. But it's never too late. For almost their whole life, they have gone through trauma, and in 18 months they can change the entire course of the life.”

RJ didn’t just receive support — he chose to grow from it. Barnardos was part of his journey, but it was RJ’s own determination, alongside the love of those around him, that carried him forward.

He chose to return, to give back, and to walk alongside young people now facing their own challenges. He’s not just helping them feel safe — he’s helping them believe in their own potential, just as others once believed in his.

And that’s the ripple effect of a legacy.

When you leave a gift in your Will to Barnardos, you’re investing in futures not yet written. Your legacy becomes part of their journey — not by leading it, but by creating the conditions for it to grow, ripple, and reach far beyond your lifetime.

You may never meet the tamariki your gift will support — but your values will live on in the lives they shape.

A safe place beneath the sky: RJ’s story

A safe place beneath the sky: RJ’s story